“Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance
for each other’s faults because of your love.” – Ephesians 4:2 (NLT)
In his bestselling book, “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People,” author Stephen Covey tells the story about an experience he had riding the New York subway one Sunday morning that changed his life.
A man and his children were sitting next to Covey on the subway. The man’s children started yelling, throwing things, and even grabbed newspapers out of the hands of the other passengers.
Upset, Covey turned to the man, who had fallen asleep next to him, woke him up, and asked him to do something about his children.
The man replied, “Oh, you’re right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don’t know what to think, and I guess they don’t know how to handle it either.”
In that moment, everything changed for Covey. His heart was suddenly filled with compassion, and he began to talk to the man about how he was holding up and what he could do to help. [1]
Many times, when someone is acting in a way that is frustrating to us, it’s oftentimes because they’re going through something hard, and they don’t know what to do. That doesn’t mean it’s okay for them to do whatever they want, but Covey’s experience on the subway is a reminder for us to pause in those moments and see what the other person might be going through before we respond.
The Stoic Philosopher Seneca is often credited with saying, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
The next time you’re in a situation where it’s hard to be patient, take a moment to remember that the other person is fighting a hard battle you are unaware of and extend to them the same grace you would want someone to give to you.
[1] Adapted from Stephen R. Covey, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (New York: Fireside, 1989), p. 30-31.
When someone is acting in a way that is frustrating for us, then, it’s usually because they’re going through something hard, and they don’t know what to do.
Tip of the Day
Practice patience today by choosing to make allowance for the faults of others, praying for them, and being on the lookout for ways you can help meet a practical need in their life.
Prayer
Dear God, I thank You for the love and patience You’ve shown me on those days when I wasn’t being loving to You. Help me to be humble and gentle. Show me how I can be patient with others today, making allowance for their faults because of Your love. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Pause and Reflect
When was a time in your life when you were unaware of someone else’s struggles and misjudged their actions?
How can you incorporate the practice of making allowance for others’ faults into your daily interactions?
In what ways can you extend grace to those who may be going through a difficult battle, even when their actions are frustrating to you?
