“I have told you these things so that you will be filled with My joy. Yes, your joy will overflow!” – John 15:11 NLT
Do you ever feel like your marriage is hanging on by a thread? No joy, no excitement, and nothing to look forward to? I know I’ve felt that way! From paying bills and folding laundry to managing schedules and cleaning the house, the “maintenance” of life has a way of stealing the joy in marriage. Somewhere along the way, passion slowly fades, and what used to be a blessing becomes a burden.
Maybe you’re like me, and you’re guilty of placing expectations on your spouse that he or she was never meant to carry. During the first two years of my marriage, I learned that unmet expectations are a joy stealer. It’s not my wife’s responsibility to make me happy. Joy is actually a choice.
Philippians 4:4 says, “Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice!” Did you know this verse is a command? God commands us to rejoice. And what God commands, He empowers us to obey. Here are some practical ways to bring joy back to your marriage:
1. Count your blessings. Make a gratitude list of things you love about your spouse. Remember, it’s the small things that make a big difference.
2. Date your spouse. Put a date night on the calendar, guard this time, and be intentional about spending quality time together.
3. Focus on listening. Marriage counselors emphasize communication, but very little attention is given to listening. Sometimes, the best gift we can give our spouse is an attentive ear. We all want to feel heard and understood. Listening goes a long way.
4. Pray together. Taking time to pray together builds a firm foundation. As cliché as it may sound, I believe a couple who prays together stays together.
Remember, marriage is like a dance that involves two people. Both need to be involved. Where there is no reciprocity, the relationship will eventually fail.
Each day, I can choose to move toward my wife or away from her. I try to remind myself of all the reasons I married my wife in the first place. I fell in love with her because I found joy in spending time with her. Take time to invest in your spouse and steal your joy back. I promise you will be filled to overflowing when you choose joy.
Reflect and Respond
1. Open up your calendar. Schedule a date night.
2. Make a gratitude list. Share it with your spouse.
3. How can you pray for your spouse this week? Schedule time to pray together.
Tags: joy happiness romance romantic affairs restoration restore
